12 September 2013

saturn / zen

I've been really drawn to minimalism lately.

I'm not sure what the driving force behind it is exactly. Most likely a lot of little things wearing on me. Living in a small space (not complaining, just saying), having too much stuff that just looking at gives me bursts of anxiety. Clutter is making me feel claustrophobic.

I went through my clothes last month and earlier this week I went through them again.
I sifted through my son's toys and put the neglected ones in a bin in the laundry room (but now I need to figure out what to do with them next).
I got rid of stuff around the house that was just taking up space (there's still more).

And I got really into it like I tend to do with things and then I started to feel impatient and frustrated with myself because I wasn't getting there fast enough. I keep thinking of the things I have to do to work toward my goal. Which is both motivating and repressive. That mindset is holding me back. In reality, it's a process. The process matters. I'm trying to be more zen but at the same time being totally un-zen with this anxious mindset. The monkey mind is up and running and taking a lot of my attention as usual, but there's more beyond that in our brains. Like breaking through a layer of Earth's atmosphere. I think of it as a clearer place. Not as cluttered.

I have more to say on this topic but the thoughts are currently swirling and not sentences.

What are you drawn to lately?

art on congress st., portland, maine.


  1. Ascending to a higher level/vibration, both on the outside and the inside xoxo

  2. I'm doing the same thing, Caroline. As you know it's a health issue for me. I will just call it FENG SHUIING my house! Then the money rolls in! Right, DUDE?